Uninvited: Chapter 9

Chapter 9: “Why Does Rejection Hurt So Much?”

Chapter 9 unpacks why rejection hurts as much as it does and how we can see the silver lining in situations of rejection.

“God is always at work. He is a present, loving Father, aware of our deepest hurts and our even deeper needs. We aren’t always able to see this clearly. Still, even when it seems otherwise, we must remember that sometimes when we feel rejected and passed over for someone else, when God seems busy elsewhere or even purposefully unmoving, the truth is He is at work, maybe doing something entirely beyond what we were thinking” (105).

I know for many people, including myself, that this is a hard concept to grasp. When life seems to be going wrong, whether that be in big or small ways, rejection is painful. It feels like God is just watching and not doing anything. However, we have to TRUST that He is working and loves us; He wants to attend to our pain and our needs. He’s always working, it just might not be in the way that you think.

“To be set apart is to be given an assignment that requires preparation. That’s what I believe God wanted me to see” (108).

This is another part of God’s plan that we aren’t supposed to fully understand, if at all. God has a purpose for each of us, and sometimes that purpose isn’t what you think it is.

“The lesson was this: Anything that infuses us with humility is good. Even if it feels a bit like humiliation in the moment, the workings of humility within are a gift” (108).

Living life with humility is good and how God wants us to live our lives.

Bible passages that address humility:

Proverbs 11:2

1 Peter 5:6

James 4:6 NLT

Proverbs 18:12

2 Chronicles 7:14


“But in addition to the blessing of compassion being developed in me, those lonely times also seem to be when Jesus lavishes His most intimate compassion on me” (110).

Take time to pray by yourself and really listen to what God has to say.

“I’m trying to weave more silence into the rhythm of my life now, so I can whisper, ‘God, what might You want to say to me right now? I’m listening'” (111).

Life is so busy and stressful, so if you can find time to bask in silence, that’s wonderful. It’s important that we talk to God, but we also have to be willing to listen and take in His message.

“It’s because I know He exists and I know He loves me that things get so confusing and complicated. My heart struggles to make peace between God’s ability to change hard things and His apparent decision not to change them for me” (114).

Life is also confusing and complicated because we don’t know God’s plan for us. We just have to take a leap of faith and trust that He is working and helping us on our journey.

“And in the course of time, things will work out…” (114).

“And if we are for giving, we have to see opportunities taken away differently. What if this opportunity wasn’t really taken away from me?” (114).

It’s important to find the silver lining in all situations, especially ones of rejection.

I hope you enjoyed this post and that Uninvited finds a way into your happy and healthy adventure. 🙂 ❤

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