Uninvited by Lysa TerKeurst: Chapter 1

Chapter 1: “I’d Rather Ignore Honesty”

Chapter 1 is about how it’s hard to look honesty in the face and come to terms with it and how it’s easier to push away and ignore and pretend like life is always good. Lysa talks about how honesty can be a GOOD thing and how we have to let it into our lives to live fully.

“As long as I suspect that honesty’s intention is to expose and hurt me, it will always feel like a dangerous thing. It’s easier to construct a more palatable life story–where I can draw straight lines from each hurt of the past to the healing I later experienced–than to face the raw truth” (2).

Honesty is hard to reconcile with because sometimes it just doesn’t feel good or right. It’s easy to make up a story that everyone will see with approval as opposed to facing our true life story head on. But doing this will actually just make life harder; it’s best to live life truthfully and honestly.

“One maliciously crafted rejection with my exact vulnerabilities in mind will pierce the deepest part of me. Being mature in my faith can help me better process it. It can help me have a better reaction to it. It can even help me remove the arrow and patch up the wound. But spiritual maturity doesn’t shield me from rejection” (3).

Sometimes, rejection gets to us because it hits the weakest parts of us or it really hits a nerve. It’s great if you’re stedfast in your faith, but even faith can’t protect you from the feelings rejection brings on. It’s important to know that those feelings that rejection causes are completely NORMAL and to try to tap into your faith to help you get through those feelings is a great thing to do.

“Honesty isn’t trying to hurt me. It’s trying to heal me” (4).

“Negative self-talk was a rejection from my past that I had allowed to settle into the core of who I am. I talked about myself in ways I would never let another person” (6).

In another book I read, it said that we should talk to ourselves about ourselves as if you were talking to a child. You wouldn’t say to a child “You’re a loser” or “You’re stupid,” would you? But we say things like that to ourselves on a daily basis. Try to push out the negative self-talk and commentary out of your life, because you don’t deserve it.

“Rejection steals the best of who I am by reinforcing the worst of what’s been said to me. Rejection isn’t just an emotion we feel. It’s a message that’s sent to the core of who we are, causing us to believe lies about ourselves, others, and God” (8).

Don’t let rejection rule your life.

I hope you enjoyed the following quotes and analysis of Chapter 1 and that it plays a part in your happy and healthy adventure. 🙂 ❤

2 thoughts on “Uninvited by Lysa TerKeurst: Chapter 1

  1. “Honesty is hard to reconcile with because sometimes it just doesn’t feel good or right.” This reminds me of the one time Fr. Marcin told me that amongst us Newmanites we’re so afraid to hurt our friends when it’s ultimately going to be good for them, i.e. reprimanding so one can grow holier. So true!

    What book did you read that said we should speak to ourselves as we would to children? That’s so interesting!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’ve always believed that honesty is the best policy, and it’s hard to be honest with our friends because we don’t want to hurt our friends. But we have to consider that not telling them the truth or the whole truth might hurt them more.

      As for the idea about speaking to ourselves as we would speak to children, I believe I read that in Brene Brown’s book, “Rising Strong.” That idea has also been reinforced in my training as a special educator.


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